Monday, December 14, 2009

Metallica to play with Slayer!

First thing any Metallica fan should know is that they will be playing with Slayer next year. Now let that sit in. Has your brain exploded yet?

I'm not sure but I think they have never played together. But still, that doesn't change the fact that this is the most exciting thing to happen since they decided to quit making the Twilight movies. Actually that never happened but I can dream right?

I heard that the theme for New Moon was going to be 'Of Wolf and Man', but they thought it would be too awesome for their movie so instead they went with some sort of orchestrated garbage (I'm kidding, orchestra music is awesome).

So I got a little sidetracked. But hey, I'm excited as hell. Problem is though, I won't be seeing this concert. Why? Because it's in another country. Yep, it's in Prague. Not only that but also  there will be Anthrax, Heaven and Hell, and Mastodon!  And then this happened:

Here is a link to the story.

Saturday, December 12, 2009

So What? The story of "So What".

Any diehard Metallifreak knows that Metallica has a quarterly newsletter entitled 'So What?' So What is a song actually that Metallica plays often at their live shows. But no, they did not write it, they merely cover it. That's right, its a cover. It is by British group "Anti-Nowhere League".

If you have never heard the song, upon hearing it, you will be offended. I mean you WILL be offended. It is the dirtiest song I have ever heard. Seriously. Copies of its initial release were banned in Britain, and subsequently burned. Its basically two guys in a pub (its British after all) having a pissing contest. They list some off the (mostly devious) things that they have ever done, with each one replying "So what?!"

Its one of my favorites though because it expresses the attitude that it doesn't matter what you have done, your not that special. So basically, its a pissing contest that satirizes pissing contests.

In the end though, its a real tounge-in-cheek song. Don't take it seriously. If you are easily offended, don't check it out. But if you think it will be funny, you will be right.

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

#1 James Hetfield

Oh boy, we are finally at number one on the countdown of the top ten people I want to meet. Its been a long journey, and we have learned much. But now it must come to an end. And what a better way to end than with the greatest frontman of all time: James Hetfield!
I love Metallica. I LOVE Metallica. They are the greatest metal band of all time hands down. They have many great songs from Master of Puppets, One, Enter Sandman, For Whom The Bell Tolls, and so on.
But lets talk about James. Man does that guy stomp tail. He plays the guitar, drums, piano, and he does the vocals. He is a very talented individual. Not only is he talented, but he also is very relatable. He is not afraid to be open and honest with his fans about his problems. He is very open to the fans. Ever since his struggle with alcoholism and his rehab time, he has been very good about letting fans share there stories with him.
I heard Hetfield mention how a fan would go up to him and say that his dad had died and he wanted to kill himself but then he listened to Fade To Black and that helped him. In fact, Metallica's music as a whole is relatable, covering a wide range of topics.
So would I do if I met Mr. Hetfield? Well, I would share my own story with him. I would share how when I feel down and depressed or angry, I plug in Metallica to help me pass my troubles. And I think thats why I have been so attracted to the band is because of my own conflicts.
I would also go out and buy a copy of my favorite album, Master of Puppets, and have him sign it. It would be one of my most cherished possessions. In fact, if you ever want to check out anything by Metallica, dear God make it Master of Puppets. Its simply great. Also here is the best music video ever.

#2 Maddox

First of all I would like to apologize to Maddox for not putting him on top of the list. Second of all I would like to beg for mercy from Chuck Norris for not including him at all. I bow in reverence before thee.Now that I have that out of the way and am not dead (yet), I
would like to talk about the funniest blogger there is, Maddox. Seriously this guy is great and so is his blog. Don't believe me? Well it doesn't matter because Maddox is always right. In fact, his web address is entitled Seriously.
But now that I'm done waxing about how great he is, I would like to discuss the nature of his website. Maddox uses a form of humor that is now known as fratire. It's what you might call man humor, but done a tongue and cheek manner. He sounds serious, but he really isn't.
One instance of this humor is on one of his most famous articles, which is about how he is better than your kids. He took real art pictures done by children and made fun of there artistic inability. That may not sound funny when put that way, but when you read the article with an open mind for humor, it can be quite hilarious.
But, some of his views (fake or not) actually make a lot of sense. In one article he ripped into the whole 'African American' issue. No, he didn't comment on blacks. He actually stays away from racist humor. No instead he talked about how ridiculous it is to entitle black people in such a way. It really is ridiculous to call all blacks African American, because many don't have ancestry from there. He pointed out that its actually more prejudice to say that than black because you are assuming that that's where they come from.
He has been around since the 90's, so he has a great deal of hilarious content on his site. But the best thing about it is his lack of ads and his sites simple layout. It was the inspiration for my own layout.
Why would I want to meet him? I wouldn't actually. I would probably look him in the eye by accident and then he would remove my heart from my chest. No eye contact is important.

#3 Penn Jillette

One of my biggest influences in recent years has been a magician. Yes, that does sound absurd. Who cares about what a magician says? Well this magician is not full of bull. In fact a lot of the things he says make a lot of sense to someone like me who has been disillusioned by party lines.
I came to a point in my life where I wanted to think for myself and not have others tell me what is and isn't right. I no longer wanted to be conservative or liberal, I just wanted to be me. What caused this change? I couldn't say for sure but it may have been motivated by me seeing some of my views as wrong.
Then I discovered a show by the name of Bull****. It's a show about some of the crazy ideas and views that many people have that are wrong headed. Its hosted by none other than the great duo of Penn and Teller. Teller doesn't do much talking (read: none), so Penn carries his weight. If you've ever seen it you would know that its a comedy. Its not in any way scientific or authoritative. But the views that are shared on the show make a lot of sense when looked at from an open perspective.
You may be thinking though that its ironic that I am influenced by a show into thinking I have laid out my own views. You would be right except that I really don't agree with everything that they say and that some of the views that we share are views that I had way before I was watching the show. It really just helped me to be more open to new ideas, and that's one of the things the show is about.
I really would like to meet Penn Jillette. I would have a lot to discuss with him. The first thing I would ask him is what set this fire in him to be so political. Then I would ask if he would sign my 'Don't Tread on Me' shirt. Why? Because that's what he is about.

Monday, November 23, 2009

#4 Shigeru Miyamoto

This is very my list gets really nerdy, but I digress. I'm really into video games, especially ones of the old school flavor. But do you ever think of the people behind these games? For most people, probably not. But for me, a great fan of video games, it does. They are the driving force behind great games or bad games.
Like directors or writers, there are ones that are greater than others. There are many great game designers (Hideo Kojima for one), but there is one who is higher and better than the rest. His name is Shigeru Miyamoto. Never heard of him? I'm sure you've heard of his games.
Lets start off with the most famous game he made: Super Mario Bros. Yep, thats right. He designed that game. That is why, in the game industry, he considered one of the greatest game designers if not the greatest.
Mr. Miyamoto also created another one of the greatest games ever: The Legend of Zelda. Oh yes oh yes! What a great game with all the secrets and dungeons and items, it's a stone cold classic. He said he based it off the adventures he used to have as a kid. Pretty interesting. I never knew that kids in Japan had to deal with giant monsters on there way to school.
So why would I want to meet him? Do you really have to ask? I would like to meet the man that made my favorite video games. I would like to see what its like to chill with such a creative individual. I would probably be star struck. He's short, but he looks like he could make you feel shorter if you were to meet him (and knew who he was). So I would probably just ask for his autograph on my copy of Super Maro Bros. 3.

#5 Magibon

Look into her eyes. Just gaze into them. Now, try to look away. You can't! All she is doing is staring and you can't look away. For instance:
I couldn't stop looking there either. Who is she? Why is she so captivating? To find out, we have delve a bit into the history of the Internet.

Ever since the beginning of YouTube (and even before that) people have uploaded videos of themselves from there web cams. Most people will usually do a variety of things but rarely deviate. Whether it be giving opinions on matters in which they are clearly qualified, talking about there lives, or just being silly. But Magibon does none of those things. What does she do? Nothing.

Seriously. All Magibon does is stare at the camera and make cute faces. There is a Metallica song entitled King Nothing. Well I call this gal Queen Nothing. She is very cute though and I can't help myself from watching her videos.

I would like to meet this young lady. I think that she would be a very interesting person to hang out with. Even if she just stared the whole time. It wouldn't get creepy. Her eyes are enormous! There like anime eyes. Maybe she could teach me some Japanese. I'm actually not joking. Yep, that's right: Magibon is a Japanophile. She is one of those people who are really fascinated by Japanese culture.

I said she does nothing, which is mostly true. But sometimes she talks. In Japanese. She actually sounds very genuine too. So I suppose I would ask her to teach me some of the language. But I would probably be too lost in her eyes to learn anything.

So you think shes cute right? Well I hope so. Just don't ask her to show you her teeth.

No wonder she smiles like she does. Still, I can't help but find her extremely attractive. And thats why I would want to meet Magibon. By the way, she is 23, not 15.